BUT.... it's MY blog and I think it's STINKIN' HILARIOUS.
Seriously I don't think I have laughed so hard about something in a long, long time and then to be able to re-read it and still laugh as hard....well that my friends is just hard to come by.
So I got this email from my fab sister in law!!
This story is about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would PLEAD with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a Doctor. She was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then on one Christmas Day morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner, he was upstairs sound asleep. She looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep. Gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts......
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic foot steps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife couldn't hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.
About 20 minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey you were RIGHT! All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean," said the wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out. Well today it finally happened...... But by the grace of God, and some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in!"
I think Cory and I have had this conversation..... and well only time will tell how it plans out! haha I know I'm gross, but really this is funny!
4 comments:
hahah, oh man! That is disgusting!
Oh that is awesome!
Funny but oh so gross! I am still cringing!
I haven't laughed so hard in weeks! Probably not since our roadtrip. :) Danny keeps asking, "What's so funny?" and I just don't think I can explain.
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